Health Hints 2010
January -
With talk of resolutions and possibilities the start of a new year seems to be the time when we tend to be more focused on the future than we are during the rest of the year. It feels as if the past has been swept away and we are presented with a clean slate to write our futures on – and what we choose to write upon that slate is up to us.
For me that is the exciting part of this time of year – to choose and set my goals and intentions as to how I want the year ahead to be for me. It is about ‘being’ rather than doing as well. After all, real achievement begins with ‘being’ rather than ‘doing’ - you have to ‘be’ different rather than simply ‘do’ different things. And you achieve more when you focus on what it is you want to be!
Word for the Year
Making the right choices for some of us though can appear daunting and we can be uncertain what it is we want for ourselves in the year ahead. Last year a client suggested that choosing one word to express how you want to be throughout the year helps you clarify and achieve your goals, dreams and desires. It was the first time I’d tried this technique and it had amazing results.
My own word was ‘successful’ and I did feel successful throughout the year irrespective of what I was actually doing and, as a result, whatever I did was successful! I met some extraordinary people personally and in business; my relationships went from strength to strength; my career entered new exciting areas; my business was more successful in all sorts of ways - so much so I asked myself if there really was a recession; my holidays were new and exciting experiences; and I discovered new, fun and effective ways to be fit and healthy!
A year ago, and during sessions with some of you, I asked you to share your own Word for the Year with me. Amongst the words that you chose were splendid, joyful, connected and fearless. This year I want to make the exercise more beneficial and useful. I’d like to hear from more of you and your Word for the Year. I will share them in the next month and, at regular intervals during the year, will check back and ask you how your year is progressing and if you have noticed any changes in your life. Click here to share your Word of the Year
The way you arrive at your word does vary. Sometimes you know your word instantly; your word may leap out at you as you are engaged in an everyday activity or as you sit quietly; perhaps you notice you are using a ‘new’ word regularly recently and choose that. The question to ask is what do you want to ‘be’ in 2010?
And my Word of the Year? It’s present. I want to be ‘present’; totally engaged in the moment and focused on what is actually happening. I’ll let you know how I get on.
Resolutions
Many New Year resolutions fail simply because they are about loss, giving up something rather than aspiring towards a goal. Goals are more successful when they are moving towards a target and achievement – when they are about positive gain for you. For example instead of stopping smoking or giving up chocolate being your resolution try ‘I am want to be healthier’ or ‘I want to be a size 14’. If you’re not convinced try this. Make two resolutions – one about giving up something and the other about gaining something and send them to me. I will share them in the next month and by asking you about them regularly you can discover which one works for you.
February - What are you choosing to notice today?
With the recent tragic events in Haiti, I noticed the way the world responded to the disaster and the humanity of that response. Governments, irrespective of their politics, sent rescue teams; NGO’s jumped into action; individuals in volunteers teams flew in to search through the collapsed buildings and offer medical assistance; and others far away pledged their support though donations. It was the common bond that I noticed; the desire to help our fellow human beings in their time of need. Of course mistakes will be made and some unscrupulous people will gain from the misery of others yet for me the focus is on the good, the positive, that makes a genuine difference.
It doesn’t have to be a disaster though to bring out the common humanity in us. I was at a set of traffic lights and a frail old lady was apprehensive about crossing the road. A man rushed over and helped her to the central island and then across the other side. It took quite a time for the lady to make the journey and the lights changed before she’d made it. Yet nobody moved or used their horn – they sat and waited. There are other stories I could share about random acts of kindness and it’s not only me.
A friend visiting from Germany was amazed recently when he noticed that people are extremely kind on the Tube compared to his home city. Rather than see people struggle, many people give up their seat for another person less comfortable standing, help ladies carry pushchairs up and down stairs or willingly stop an older person from struggling with a heavy suitcase that is no problem for them to lift up the stairs. And the difference it made to him was he not only noticed he started to act, to do the same and loved being able to help.
And that’s the point. it’s about more than noticing, it’s about taking action. By noticing we become aware and focus our energy in a particular direction and do more than notice - and simple random acts of kindness make a real difference to another human being.
Its gets better as well. Once you begin to notice random acts of kindness and the common humanity you share with others, you begin to focus on the good and positive qualities of people and that affects the way you live your life. Your day is spent in solutions, you are present to every moment rather than immune to others, life is actually easier and, incredibly, business and work become positive experiences.
What are you choosing to notice today?
Word for the Year
The idea behind the Word for the Year is that by choosing one word to express how you want to ‘be’ throughout the year, no matter what you are actually doing, helps you clarify and achieve your goals, dreams and desires. I’d tried this technique last year and had seen amazing results. Below are the words you shared with me. Some of you actually chose the same as others and some words may not fit exactly into the concept of ‘being’ yet this doesn’t matter– the important thing is your words resonates with you and your life.
Your Words for the Year |
results |
positive |
value |
limitless |
delight |
present |
stupendous |
completion |
perseverance |
focused |
tenacious |
honouring |
delivering |
whole |
fulfilled |
dynamic |
fruitful |
happy |
serene |
effective |
achieving |
successful |
disciplined |
certainty |
inspired |
fun |
belief |
breakthrough |
pizzazz |
forgiving |
If you have yet to share your word and want to or want to share anything that you have noticed already please click here Word of the Year. I will be in contact throughout the year to see how your year is going.
March - Three weeks ago, I arrived at the local swimming pool and realised I’d left my swimming goggles at home. I decided to buy a cheap pair of goggles at the pool – it seemed silly to pay a lot when I had my regular pair at home. After changing, and a few easy adjustments to the goggles, I began to swim and that’s when it struck me – these goggles were perfect, much better than my old ones. Water stayed out completely so I didn’t have to stop and empty them after a couple of lengths and I could see clearly length after length rather than swimming in a fog! It was a powerful yet simple reminder at the way I live my life these days.
A few years ago I would have become annoyed at myself for not being organised and forgetting my goggles; now I have learned that ‘everything is happening perfectly’. It may not always seem so at the time yet in hindsight it always does. The house that you were gazumped on and then found your perfect home for less in your perfect location; the job you never got and decided to change your career direction and now love going to work rather than dreading it; the promotion that went to someone else that helped you realise you enjoyed time with your friends and family; the redundancy that resulted in you taking time out to travel the world; the friend that moved away and you found a new friend who encouraged you to be the best you could; the ending of a relationship that gave you space to grow and open new doors in your life. Our lives are an endless list of such experiences.
It can be hard when our lives seem to be going wrong yet with a few moments to reflect on our pasts, the reality everything is happening perfectly is difficult to ignore. Try it. Next time life seems to be moving in the opposite direction from where you want it to or things seem to be going wrong, step back, pause and see what happens. It can seem impossible at the time yet after a few minutes, an hour, a week or even a few years you can look back and realise that it did all happen perfectly.
Now when I find myself becoming frustrated, impatient or anxious at anything – and often the smallest thing can trigger such feelings - I remind myself that ‘everything is happening perfectly’ and enjoy waiting to see the perfect outcome.
What is happening perfectly in your life today?
April - What does a bout of snowy weather, a stomach bug, leaving your mobile phone at home and a cloud of volcanic ash have in common? They can all break our regular routine and create a sense of awareness that is often lost in the day to day routines of our lives. Aspects of our lives we usually take for granted such as getting to work, eating whatever you like, being in constant contact with anyone and everyone take on a significance and greater effort than usual.
Initially we develop habits and routines consciously and then very quickly they become the norm. Soon we catch the same train to work, automatically pull out the mobile phone to send text messages whenever we are sitting on our own, drive the usual route to work, have the same food for breakfast and expect our lives to be the same and familiar in so many ways. What awareness brings is a questioning about these routines – it does not mean routines are wrong simply that we can make changes that perhaps serve us better than the current choices we are making.
Recently, I left my mobile phone at home when I travelled to London. I was surprised at how bereft I felt and then realised that whenever I was sitting on a train I often pulled out my mobile and started to play Sudoku. I was also struck by how much time I spend on trains and, therefore, how much time I was engaged in Sudoku rather than reading a decent book or simply enjoying the journey. It was a great wakeup call and my ‘train routine’ has certainly changed. I have decided that I travel far too much for work and want to work more from my home and that I can play Sudoku rather than it play me! Since then I have become increasingly aware of my routines and its really empowering to make changes that serve me well in my life.
Although for some of us it will take a major event to create an awareness of our routines, it doesn’t have to be that way. Start with a small change and see the effects. Try deliberately leaving your mobile at home on a Saturday when you go shopping or try a new breakfast cereal – be warned though even these can be scary initially. And if you want to share your experiences even better. Let me know how you get on.
The greatest benefit of an increased awareness in our daily lives is that it provides the opportunity for us to become aware of the choices we are actually making and to feel in control of our lives rather than being on auto pilot and allowing life to happen to us. What choices are you aware of in your life today?
May - Are you working to live or living to work? Are you finding it hard to find time for you in your life or do the things you want to do fit into your day easily and perfectly? Have you noticed that there are some people who are always working whereas others seem to have oodles of time to enjoy themselves and go to work? Why is it that some people work long hours and others seem to give work a passing glance? The difference is the choices that people make and the stories people tell themselves about their careers.
Whether you work for someone else or run your own business – either as a one man band or the director of a larger company employing others - you may hold the belief that the more hours you work the greater the rewards and the more successful you, and your company, will be. Working long hours though can stem from a fear of failure and manifest itself in numerous behaviours and patterns. For example you can feel guilty unless you are busy and occupied on work related tasks; that someone else will get the deal if you don’t put the work in; you will fail unless you are always working; relaxing and time for you becomes a thing of the past; you can feel you never reach your full potential; one day everything will be perfect and you will be on top of things; you fit your actual work into your long hours; you often think about the endless list of tasks that lie ahead; you are continually justifying why you are not ‘working’; you wake early worrying about work and find you can’t get back to sleep – the list is truly endless.
If this list contains some examples that seem familiar to you then there are a number of solutions my clients have identified to be efficient and effective at work, to run a successful business and have a life outside of work.
- Be aware of the working habits you have developed without being aware of them
- Take care of yourself first – remember that in the safety drill given aboard aircraft you put on your own oxygen mask first before helping others!
- Have definite set working hours and stick to them, especially when working at or from home
- Avoid ‘home related’ chores such as the ironing and washing – you wouldn’t be able to do them if you were in the office
- Stay focused and keep the television turned off
- Include morning and afternoon breaks and a lunchtime away from the work place to recharge physically and mentally
- Be aware when you begin your communication with the outside world each day – many of us turn on our pc, laptops PDA’s and mobiles automatically first thing and even before we have eaten breakfast or showered!
- Decide what time you want to cease communication with the outside world via your pc, mobile, PDA’s, laptops etc. – a business meeting at 10 pm is neither constructive or professional as one during the day and whatever happened to being unavailable anyway?
- If you work at home get showered, dressed and eat breakfast before you do any work related activity
- Do the jobs you hate first every day – the rest of the day gets easier and a ‘hate to do’ pile that you will do anything to avoid never appears.
- Be disciplined about where you work at home – you wouldn’t lounge on the sofa or use your laptop on a bed at the office
- Be honest with yourself – are you going to meet a colleague for a ‘potential’ business deal simply to avoid writing a report you will end up doing at midnight
- Write time for you into your diary, especially when you will have completed a piece of work that you were dreading, and stick to it – a gym session, a massage, a round of golf etc.
- Make your working week ½ a day less – you will be surprised that you can actually achieve the same that you do now. One of my clients now works three and a half days a week rather than five and earns more!
- Put your holidays in you diary – and when one is over write in the next scheduled time you will be away from work
- Have time off totally from work at for at least one day each week
- Have separate mobiles for work and personal use
- On holidays leave your work at home – that includes your communication devices that enable you to contact the office. When a client worked out his hourly rate for the hours he was ‘present’ in one shape or another at work he was shocked.
- Know the world won’t collapse if you take time off
I’m always amazed by the creativity of the human mind and am certain this list is far from exhaustive. If you have others to share, please let me know.
Are you working to live or living to work?
June - Have you noticed how many fortune tellers there are in our lives? I really became aware of this during the recent general election as the various political TV pundits were commenting on the new coalition government. These soothsayers knew, with absolute certainty, that the coalition would last three months or nine months and that it would end in this way or that. I half expected a crystal ball to appear at any moment and was tempted to ask them for the Lotto numbers!
Instead I found myself saying ‘let’s wait and see’ and ‘give them a chance’ not because I have a particular political allegiance simply because I felt this was about the opportunity to create something new and exciting from change and I wanted to wait and see before I made my own mind up about it. And the reality was that none of them knew how long the coalition would actually last – they were guessing.
I have noticed that fortune telling isn’t confined to political pundits either. In everyday life, lots of people seem to enjoy the certainty that predicting the future brings them and be quick to decide the outcome of an event even before its actually happened! How many times have you heard a friend tell another that a new relationship is doomed before the first date or a business deal is a disaster when all you have suggested is a meeting?
The truth is the future is unknown and our own fear can prevent us from going with the flow and seeing what happens. We spend our days using energy and focusing on the future missing the moment and the possibilities of it – after all the only place we have real and genuine choice about the future is in the moment. Sometimes it’s necessary to step back and see what happens rather than predict and speculate; to give something a chance before we decide; to pause and enjoy the possibility of the future.
Have you met any fortune tellers or heard any predictions today? Let me know.
2009 Health Hints
